Jesus said, "Your love for each other will prove to the world that you are my disciples" (John 13:35). And nothing turns non-Christians off from church like Christians bickering with each other about things that seem trivial from the outside. 

The following are a list of things that I've personally seen Christians get heated with each other over:

- Consuming Alcohol
- Predestination
- Women & Men's Roles
- Infant Baptism
- Gifts of the Holy Spirit
- Christian vs. Public Schooling
- Donald Trump

For all these topics, the reasons they create bickering is because there is often a personal story attached to them. Take alcohol, for example. Some saw it abused by family members and have strong feelings against it. Others were made to feel guilty for drinking it by legalistic and self-righteous Christians, so they have strong feelings against its prohibition.

Now there are three ways a church community could respond to any hot-button topic.

1. Talk about it and separate into camps and sects. This happened a lot in the last century. 

2. Avoid talking about it for the sake of unity. I think many churches that started post 1995 land in this camp, after being disgusted with the division that #1 caused.

3. Talk about it in humility and let it lead to deeper unity.

Although it's risky and doesn't always work, True Life has always taken the 3rd stance whenever these things come up, and we will continue to do so with the current topic that seems to have stirred the pot quite a bit for people -- speaking in tongues and the other crazy gifts of the Holy Spirit.

CHASING GIFTS AND CAUSING DIVISION

Back in 2007, I was on staff at a large non-denominational church in LA. I was overseeing the small groups ministry as a job, and in my spare time I was reading a lot about the gifts and power of the Holy Spirit with a small group of friends. Being young and excited, we wanted to see some of the crazy things happen in our lives that we were reading about.

I was partly motivated by a hunger for God's glory, partly motivated by love for people, and partly motivated by the desire to have cool stories to share.

I learned about praying in tongues and started to pray in tongues.

I learned about healing and went out asking people on the street if I could pray for them. I asked strangers in wheel-chairs to try standing up.

I learned about prophecy and asked God to give me a "word" for everyone I met.

I had tact and people skills, so I was never rude or overtly obnoxious about it. But I was definitely on the prowl all the time for chances to see miracles happen.

Eventually I started visiting some small groups and talking to them about the Holy Spirit. I would take them out on the street to talk to strangers about Jesus. I encouraged them to expect God to give them a supernatural word of knowledge for those strangers. Sometimes legitimate miracles happened. I remember one girl's broken ankle was healed on the spot. We made her prove it. it was awesome.

But soon, I started to have people compare me and a couple other staff members to the rest of the church staff. I remember one guy coming into my office complaining about how I was one of the only ones in the church teaching and encouraging people in these things.

There was subtle division occurring in some peoples' eyes: on one side are those in the church who were seen as being "stuck in the regular Christian activities" and those who were with me -- "hungry for God's power and the miraculous." 

And looking back, if I was honest with myself I would have to admit that part of me was flattered to be esteemed higher than others. So while I didn't encourage this divisive mindset, I also didn't work hard to stop it. Shame on me.

I never want to be found on the side of actively or even passively encouraging division again. Not in a church. Not between churches.

As a result, the topic of Christians splintering off into groups or church-hopping over minor offenses is a hot-button topic for me. It gets me fired up. It's why I'm writing this.

BRUCE SPEAKING IN TONGUES

Two weeks ago, as we were ending the service, as the band was ending the final song, as I was getting up to dismiss us, all of a sudden everyone heard what sounded like someone yelling in an Asian dialect. Some of us knew it was Bruce speaking in tongues, but not everyone did (someone even said they thought a video was accidentally turned on by the tech team).

Bruce was just being obedient to what he felt God was leading him to do. We had never given instructions on a Sunday morning about tongues, so Bruce had no reason not to let it out. He did it at the end of service and did not interrupt anything, so it was not intrusive. And Bruce is one of the most sincere guys I know -- not seeking to draw attention to himself, not wanting to freak anyone out.

So my response was, “I know that was probably weird to some of you, but that was Bruce speaking in tongues for the first time in here. Does anyone have an interpretation?” After a moment Debi, Bruce’s wife, gave a quick encouragement about receiving what God has for us.

And that was that. I dismissed the service and went out to meet people.

And then I started getting calls...texts….emails…...Not many, but way much more than I normally get after a Sunday service.

Some people were encouraged or at least interested in a good way.

Some people were confused, with theological questions.

Some people were freaked out and thought it was creepy. 

Some people were afraid of what it means for our church.

And some people wondered what the big deal is and why the stir?

WHY THE STIR

There is good reason for the various responses.

The bible talks about the gifts of the Holy Spirit -- teaching, helping, administering, leading, encouraging. But there are also weird gifts, called sign gifts -- like healing, prophecy, words of knowledge, and tongues.

And let's face it - tongues is perhaps the weirdest of all those gifts.

And to make it more confusing, when people talk about speaking in tongues, they might mean one of three different things:

1. Speaking a message in tongues that the person speaking doesn't understand, but that others understand in their native language. This happened on the day of Pentecost when Jesus' disciples began speaking in dialects that visitors to Jerusalem heard and understood in their languages and were amazed by. Nobody argues that this happened in Scripture, although many argue that this doesn't happen, anymore.

2. Speaking a message in tongues to a group of people that is not in a human dialtect. But it can be interpreted as a prophetic encouragement for the listeners. It is debated as to whether this occurs in Scripture, and those that believe it does occur still debate with each other about who should do the interpretation and how to know when an interpretation is valid.

3. Praying in tongues is mainly for the building up of the person praying. They are not praying human words to God but rather praying "in the spirit."  People debate as to whether this is what "praying in the spirit" means in Scripture; and those that believe it does happen in Scripture debate with each other as to weather it's for today; and those that believe it's for today debate as to weather everyone can pray in tongues.

Whew!

Do you get the theological controversy?

Then there are the Philosophical / Vision questions about our specific church - even if it’s biblical and we are on the same page theologically, are Sunday mornings the most appropriate place for them? My kids were freaked out. I want to invite guests.

PERSONAL STORIES

As I said in the beginning of this long blog post, hot-button topics become hot-button because peoples' strong opinions usually have a personal story behind them. I've gotten to hear some of them.

One person told me that he grew up in a church where every Sunday people were invited to come down and be prayed over to start speaking in tongues. He went down numerous times, but never started speaking in tongues. This made him feel like a less-than-Christian, like something was wrong with him, and he wondered if he really had the Holy Spirit.

Someone else told me she was in a church where everyone was getting knocked over, supposedly by the Holy Spirit, but when it came to her she didn't go down. So the pastor said she must be oppressed by Satan.

Someone else told me that she started speaking in tongues un-expectedly at a charismatic church that she didn't want to be at, and she felt the love of God in it, so when she heard Bruce do it she felt her encouraged.

Someone else told me that when Bruce started speaking in tongues, she immediately started crying tears of joy.

Someone else told me that when Bruce started speaking in tongues, her heart was immediately turned off because it happened too much in her church growing up.

Someone else told me that he was part of a church where the same two women had a message in tongues every week for the church, and so he started to feel like it was a gimmick.

Bruce himself told me that he used to be weirded out by this stuff, too. Until something happened one day in a church (he'll share that in a few weeks). 

**there are many other stories that I heard that would make this long blog even longer. 

FAITHFUL TO THE TEXT, FAITHFUL TO THE PEOPLE

That's something I was taught as a preacher -- to be faithful to what the bible actually says, but to also faithful to the people listening to the message. Where are they at? What are they struggling with? What are their hang-ups? What are they skeptical about? What time of day is it?

In other words, I wouldn't give a seminary-level lecture about the Trinity to elementary kids after a long day at school (not that I could give a seminary-level lecture on the Trinity to anyone).

But this applies as a pastor as well. My big question is - how do we encourage people to embrace all that the Holy Spirit has to offer….while protecting the unity of our church and making sure everyone's stories are taken into account?

Because on one hand, I see strong-holds in peoples' lives that only the Holy Spirit can break. I see marriages in turmoil that only the Holy Spirit can heal. I see broken relationships that only the Holy Spirit can reconcile.

And on the other hand, I see the potential for all of the above gift talk to be a distraction to people that actually prevents them from letting the Holy Spirit do what he wants to do in their hearts.

In the most detailed passage on the gifts of the spirit -- 1 Corinthians 12-14 -- Paul’s main overriding point is that the gifts are good, if they’re used in love and lead to unity. In fact, the famous love chapter of 1 Corinthians 13 is really not directly about marriage; it's about using the gifts of the Spirit at the right time and in the right way so that it builds up the church.

So we want to be patient with each other on all these controversial and hot-button topics, bear with each other, seek to know -- truly know -- what the bible says about them, and ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom about how to apply what the bible says about them in our context.

"For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit" (1 Cor. 12:13).

WHAT'S NEXT?

Before giving any instructions about how these gifts should play out on Sunday mornings, here’s what we’re gonna’ do on this topic:

First our leadership team needs to wrestle through some of the theological questions that have come in, and make sure we're on the same page...or at least know where there is disagreement. We don't want to be giving different answers to people. 

Then we're going to go through a teaching series on the Holy Spirit. I was planning to do a series on the Holy Spirit, anyway, after we finish the book of Ephesians, but we're going to change the plan and start it soon. Within a few weeks, most likely.

In the meantime, I’m asking everyone to do three things:

1. Send me your questions, concerns, and stories on the topic of the Holy Spirit and your experience with these gifts. Please. It’ll help us be "faithful to the people."

2. In your life groups, I encourage you to talk about, desire and pursue the gifts of the Spirit, as your life group leaders direct. Some groups are at a place to do that, others are not.

A note on our life groups: Our life groups are more intimate than Sunday morning, and so I think it’s easier to be motivated by love when it’s more intimate. When you know the people in the room. If a new person is freaked out and has questions, we may not know it on a Sunday morning. But if someone speaks in tongues in a life group, someone else can immediately ask, "What the heck was that?" And everyone can discuss it.

Plus, when Paul was writing to the church at Corinth and giving instructions on these gifts, he was writing to house churches. Which is what our life groups are more like than Sunday mornings.

3. Have humility. Our human tendency is to think that everyone else should be just like me when it comes to controversial things. And while we should all have strong convictions about things, we have to also be willing to admit that none of us see things clearly. We won't until Jesus comes back.

"Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away........12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.." (1 Cor. 13:8-10, 12).

WHAT IF......

We are all shaped by our past experiences and church backgrounds. So when we think of what it looks like for a church to be filled with the presence of the Holy Spirit, we all think of different things. 

For some of us, we think about spontaneous outbursts of dancing and tongues. 

For others, we think about a quiet and orderly reverance in our gatherings. 

For others, we think of a culture where there is regular confessing of sin and tears of repentance. 

For others, we think of weekly altar calls and baptisms. 

For others, we think of deep & meaty bible studies. 

But what if God did something new in our church that doesn't look like anything we've seen before? What if a move of the Holy Spirit is different than what we've seen at other churches? What if all our diverse backgrounds are somehow meshed together into something brand new? 

Let's pray and find out.