Leading up to our 10-year anniversary this past Sunday, I did not have many thoughts or feelings. It wasn't a big deal at first.

And then it hit me on Saturday night. There was gratefulness and sadness. There was excitement and there was grief.

And then over the course of Sunday there was even frustration.

I want to try to share a few of the thoughts that emerged as I’ve been processing those feelings.

1. I got too much credit.

I appreciate what many of you said to me, but I definitely got too much credit for what God has done in our church these last 10 years.

I don’t say that to be humble. It’s just the truth. I am a stickler for what is true.

So many other people should’ve been honored in addition to -- or even instead of -- me.

Because Scripture calls us a body in 1 Corinthians 12, perhaps I'm the mouth, doing most of the speaking and vision-casting. But the ears and hands and eyes and legs should also be honored.

And I was kicking myself for not being prepared to honor enough other individuals.

There’s so many that I still don’t even know how to do it.

For example - prior to Covid, I was at the school at 7:30 with the truck every week, meeting Jerry Schiavo and John Hansen and Steve Dawdy and many others to unload and set up. 

Now multiple other people like Rich Treear and Jeff Maselli and Jesse Cortright and Bob Daber Sr. and Chris Walters bring the truck in and unload. 

This past Suday I rolled in closer to 9, after many others had been there setting up since 7:30. 

I'm super grateful that I'm not needed until after 8:30, but those above-mentioned people - and others who come early to set up like Bill Weaver and Bill Robertson and still more I'm not mentioning - deserve to be honored. 

Then there's the team who put together the party on Sunday. Jerry and Nanci Schiavo, Arne and Lori Lien, Kathi Hoever and Marlene Dunton… Those are people who serve behind the scenes in so many ways.

Someone thanked me for their kids being baptized in our church. I am thrilled about their kids being baptized, but I didn’t personally invest in their kids much. Other people did. Multiple kids volunteers and youth leaders - both current and past - helped point their kids to Jesus. 

I could go on and on.

Our church would not have made it or had the impact it has had if it wasn’t for the faithfulness of so many of you guys. 

2. I wasn’t prepared to celebrate my wife’s role in our church. 

Jess is not an out front person. She doesn’t like to be on the microphone. She doesn’t sit in board meetings or staff meetings. She doesn’t run women’s ministries.

She’s behind the scenes volunteering in different capacities, meeting with people, babysitting, and -  most importantly - keeping me grounded.

There have been times when I wanted to throw in the towel and she helped me to stop catastrophizing.

There were emails that I was going to send and she kept me from sending them.

There were people I was frustrated with and she helped me to understand where they were coming from.

There has been late night phone calls and last minute meetings and she’s put up with much.

I certainly wouldn’t have lasted without her.

Or I’d be in jail.

3. The slideshow that was shown on Sunday morning hit me in ways I wasn’t expecting.

I didn’t see it until Sunday morning, and to look at so many faces who have come in our church, and some faces who have left, struck a nerve. Some of the faces on the screen have moved away, some people have died, and some have left the church for reasons that I still don’t understand.  

I think there were some losses that I never fully grieved, or began to grieve all over again. 

4. Then there are the people in our church who were not represented in that slideshow.

Some of us realized after the fact that certain people were missing, and if that's you then I really hope the devil doesn't get in your head making you think you are not valuable.

Jeff Borkoski and Mandy Mercado went through hundreds of photos and just used what they had access to and what they could fit in a 5-minute deal. 

We did put together a new version with a few new inserts here. 

But still, we don’t have photos on everyone, and it doesn’t mean you’re not valuable. 

5. Finally, for those who really want to bless me....

I’ve said this before and it is perhaps even more true now – the thing that blesses me the most, that encourages me the most, that puts wind in my sails the most, is when I hear from you guys about other individuals in our church who have impacted you (like when I heard Lorraine talking about the impact of Rigo & Mandy's life group, or Michael talking about his men's life group).

We set out to be a church that is not Pastor-centric, with a community that will continue on if I get hit by a truck, with relationships that enable people to feel loved even when I fail at loving them - and so hearing evidence of that is the most encouraging thing for me.

I would much rather hear someone say, "I'm at True Life because the strengths of the community outweigh the shortcmings of Pastor Chris," rather than have someone tell me, "I have to leave True Life; even though you're great, Pastor Chris, I don't have any genuine friends here." The first one might wound my ego a bit, but it would encourage my spirit a great deal. 

If you have a story about a particular person who has impacted you or ivested in you or blessed you, I’d love to hear about it.  It doesn’t mean that other people haven’t also impacted you, but I would love to hear about specific individuals and specific situations. 

It would truly be the best gift you can give me. 

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That's all. Just wanted to share.