Have you ever had a season in your life in which it's become apparent that God is tugging at one, specific area of your heart?Well, I'm in one of those seasons.

The Book of 1 Corinthians has proven to be one of the most influential books of the bible in my walk with Christ. At the start of this series, I remember first hearing the title "Church Gone Wild", and letting out a hardy, amused laugh. "MY CHURCH IS SO COOL!", I thought, not only because of the comedy instilled in the title, but also because of the realness this title implied. Churches still DOgo wild (We ain't perfect, despite what pressure we and others might put on us to be so!), much like the goings on of the people of Corinth in Paul's day. In 2019, we are still faced with the task of how to manage our often wildly different viewpoints. The authenticity of True Life Church drew me in nearly two years ago, and it continues to shape who I am and how I live my life as a Christian in a world continually faced with conflict.

So. I'm in one of those seasons. God has been walking alongside me as I pick up new truths that are helping to shape me into a more Christ-like woman, and He's patiently and lovingly holding my hand as I let the old things that held me back, slip between my fingers. One of those hold-me-back kinda things is judgment.

I grew up "knowing" what was right and what was wrong. I made great choices, and I also made some poor ones, and I certainly knew who else was making the wrong choices. Sometimes I would comment on what I felt was wrong that others were doing, but often I kept it bottled up in my heart. I let that silent judgment create a chasm in my heart, separating me further and further from simply loving others, flaws and differences included.

Retrospectively I can see so clearly how I let my strong-held beliefs and convictions negatively impact the way I pointed others to Christ. My walk as a Christian became more of a battle to "do the right thing" (which I was so sure was a black and white kinda thing) and be seen doing it than to live a life that pointed to Christ, through wisdom and love.

God has been convicting me.

Do you know what the greatest thing about this season is? God has known this about me all along. He knows my flaws. He knows what I'm going to struggle with for the rest of my life. He's seen me struggle with judgment. He's seen me say nasty things to others. He's seen me act out of pride, and he's never left me. He's always loved me. He's always been pointing to his son. He's stayed with me through seasons in which I wasn't quite sure I agreed with what He had to say.

Ask me to tell of a time when God turned his back on me because of who I voted for, and I won't be able to do it. Ask me to tell of a time when God was more preoccupied with which holidays I celebrated than he was with the health and salvation of my soul, and I won't be able to do it. Ask me of a time when God saw me as less of a person or less of a Christianbecause I didn't live my life how others were living theirs, and I won't be able to do it.

God is a father who, above all, wants us to accept the love that his son has shed on us by the cross, and wants us to live a life that ultimately aims to live out that love on others. Let us remember we are all his children, and we are all deeply loved by HIM!