Ephesians 1:4-5 (NLT)
“Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.”

What is going on? My stomach is non-stop nervous almost nauseous. My heart is racing so hard it scares me! My chest feels like an elephant is sitting on me. It is hard for me to catch my breath. Each day the worries, the doubts, and the anxiety get heavier and heavier! All I want to do is shut down!

As each day gets harder, it gets harder to keep my focus on God! My thoughts won’t shut up!
“You’re not qualified!”
“You are not reliable or trustworthy!”
“You’re not knowledgeable enough!”
“You’re not strong enough!”
“You’re not lovable”
“You’re not worthy enough!”
“You’re not courageous!”
“You are foolish, who do you think you are to think God really loves you and finds you worthy!”

I don’t know what to do! I don’t know how to shut down these lies! I don’t know how to crush and defeat them!

Every day I see Him standing there with His hand reaching out to me! He is ready to defeat and crush every lie! He is ready to strengthen me! He is ready to fill me with His courage! He is ready to heal me! He is ready to use me! He is ready to renew me! He is ready to love me unconditionally! All I have to do is reach out and hold onto Him. I yell at myself, “Just grab His hand!” But I just put my head down and walk away! What is stopping me? With each day I walk away the lies get louder and louder.

He never gives up on me even though I keep walking away! Then I began to notice that it looked like He is shouting, but I can’t hear Him! Then one day, I think I hear something when I look up at Him, but I’m not sure. I think God said to me, “I have chosen you with pleasure!” I stopped for a second, pondered and as usual, I walked away not believing Him. But the next day He was louder, “You are adopted through Jesus!” The next day He said, “I love you!” “I will give you rest!”

He is getting louder and louder!
“You are no longer a slave!”
“Your debt has been paid!”
“You are redeemed!”
“You will always be mine!”
“I am your refuge!”
“I am your strength!”
“I am your peace!”
“Fear not!”
“Trust me!”
“Focus on me!”

Ok! Ok! I hear you! I take one step of faith towards God and then another! As my focus stays on God, my walk begins to gets faster and faster. My arms are reaching out farther and farther. Finally, I grabbed His hand and He pulls me in and wraps His arms around me! The tighter He holds me the quieter the lies get! They begin to turn into whispers and His words get stronger and louder! As I sob in the safety of His arms I hear Him so very clearly! “I do love you! I chose you even before I made the world! You are redeemed! Let go of your worries, your doubts, and your anxieties of the world and focus on me! Who are you? You are mine! You are my holy chosen daughter!”